Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Napping with Handcuffs

Recently, I have been craving “firmness” from BDH. I know I will sound like a brat, but I have been acting like a well, brat, to get his hand to connect to my backside. Hubby realizes what is going on, and the Man understands me much better than I understand myself. He gives half a smile before he yanks me over his lap to have my bottom warmed. Even after several hard swaps I am still craving more. I am shaking and yearning. He pulls away from me, and I am too shy to tell him I want more. Its not that I want to be manhandled, its that I want him to SHOW me he can manhandle me. I already KNOW he can, but I will be darned if I want the arms that I know are strong enough to hold me down TO hold me down. I want him to dominant and control me. I am at the level of trust with him I have no fear of losing control to him. I feel a burning, throbbing desire inside to just, err… I don’t know!!!

Another change is that sex feels intense, but not intense enough. I feel like I want his hands and lips all over me. I crave his touch. I have spent a week with this desire to have my bottom spanked and be so thoroughly tumbled in bed I am too tired to move. It has been driving me insane.

Even though I enjoy a firm spanking, I still fight it on basic principal. Sometimes my arms and legs flail around because it hurts, while it feels good. Hubby will tell me to stop moving, or I am going to get more. This tends to increase my struggles. ☺

BDH has recognized the shift in me. That is probably why he felt it was time to stop some of my struggling. So, he introduced handcuffs this weekend. Six months ago if BDH had brought handcuffs in and threatened to use them on me, I think I would have stopped running when I hit the East Coast, and I live in Texas. I found myself naked, laying on my tummy and handcuffed to the bed. That is when I met the next surprise BDH had for me. My behind got spanked with a leather paddle. He alternated between spanking me and touching that most sensitive place on my body. I laid there, under his knowing hands, and completely lost it. The wonderful Man who married me, knew what I had been wanting. He had been wisely waiting to make sure I was ready for it. And, oh was I ready. My body felt twisted in ways I cannot even begin to describe. The pleasure was unimaginable. The spanking was harder and longer than I have experienced before, and his hands on me felt like heaven. Finally, I lay exhausted and completely satisfied, but BDH wasn’t done with me. The last three smacks on my sore bottom almost had me in tears. He held me in his arms while I gasped for breath. I was so exhausted all I wanted to do was sleep. And I did sleep, while still handcuffed. That seemed to bring such a feeling of security. Yes, being handcuffed made me feel secure. This is a totally new revelation, and I am still trying to wrap my brain around this concept.

I have never felt the way I felt then. I had no control over anything and it was the most freeing experience. When BDH woke me up, almost an hour later, I had no desire to test, prod or push for anything. I happily did what he asked.

I hope, with all my heart, I get to experience that again. It is exactly what I have been looking for

1 comment:

  1. What an awesome time you had,
    You are so loved and cared for, I am happy for you Hugs
    Lil Sam

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